Thursday, September 6, 2007
Fragments of Life and Mommy Guilt
My days seem incredibly full and it is easy to rush from one activity to another without taking time to really see life through God’s eyes.
As mommies we tend to wrestle with a lot of guilt. We tend to compare ourselves with others (which scripture warns us not to do)
and find ourselves wanting.
The truth is when life throws us a curve ball and we end up looking our mortally squarely in the face (as my friend Emily did recently http://hiskids37.blogspot.com/ ) we find the thought of not being here for our families very, very sobering. Even if we aren't doing everything perfect we are irreplaceable in the lives of our families!
In my quiet time recently I cried out to God, I was feeling overwhelmed and just not up to the task of another year of homeschooling.
God spoke so clearly to me in response from the book of John; and though I am using the verse out of context it spoke directly to my weary heart.
Jesus had just fed 5000 men (plus women and children) from five barley loves and two small fishes. So when they were filled, He said to His Disciples…
"Gather up the fragments that remain, so that nothing is lost."
Fragments that was all I had to offer God, fragmented thoughts and plans, fragmented time, fragmented emotions. Bits and pieces here and there from past years of schooling that needed to be somehow shaped into a cohesive homeschool year.
Gather up the fragments that remain, so that nothing is lost." Jesus was speaking to me ... telling me bring me those fragments I can use them. Like a child bringing her Daddy a broken toy to fix, and that’s okay because healing and fixing broken things is what our Heavenly Father does best.
I am convinced nothing will be lost if I gather up the fragments and leave them with God.
Maybe you have brokenness in your own life... it's okay.